"He Hit her with a Pillow"

he hit her with a pillow

He hit her with a pillow.
He did. He hit her with a pillow. And she did not say anything.
You are sitting here like, "Well duh, that seems a little over dramatic."
But you don't know what kind of pillow it was. It was that one memory foam, cylinder one. The one that was never allowed to be used in pillow fights with her siblings. The one that hurts when it hits you with a significant amount of force. Some of you know. But most of you don't.

You don't know about the pillow, so how can she justify it? She can't, so she doesn't.

The plan was to just hangout, get food, watch TV, maybe even have her roommate with them to prevent him from any funny business. But plans changed. He wanted her to do things. He wasn't asking; he was demanding.

"Give me head", he demanded.
"No"
"Come on, don't be lame. Give me head."
"No" , she said more forceful this time; one second before he turned around and smacked the pillow across her face.

But it was just a pillow, no one would have understood.
*  *  *
When he finally transferred her friend texted her, "You're free baby girl".

(Iowa State University - August 2016 : a student athlete)


He sent her text messages intending to, some way or another, get what he wanted.

"When you're done drinking I'm trying to do some things."

"When you get home later I'm coming over."

"Why won't you do anything with me, I didn't do anything to make you hate me."

"Why can't you skip class and come over? It's just one class and I am tired so I deserve it."

"When can I get a piece of you?"

"When will you stop being a bitch?"

"Why are you so lame? Just come show me if you know how to have fun."

But when she would share the messages, people would ask her why she didn't just do it. He isn't in the wrong for being disrespectful, she is for being a "bitch".

(Iowa State University - Summer 2016 : all from student athletes)

he hit her with a pillow

The customers at work are inappropriate.
"What? Are you serious? That cannot be true, no customer would approach a woman server in any inappropriate way, you are over reacting."

Oh really? But what about that time an older man followed her to a secluded register and immediately put his arms around her and stayed that way until she was finished putting in her order and attempting to walk away?

But what about that time one of the other female coworkers had a towel whipped onto her butt repeatedly from a male customer?

But what about that time a man approached her with a naked picture of a woman in a hotel bed and told her the way she look reminded him of the woman?

OH, and that time the man with a wife and three children told her he wouldn't allow her to close out his tab until she gave him her phone number, and stuck around until 15 minutes after they closed at 1 am?

Or the time a man offered to tip her hundreds of dollars if she carried his bowling ball out to his car? Is it wrong of her to immediately assume he would do something wrong, outside away from everyone's watchful eye?

But none of that is serious. They are just being goofy men, who are trying to flirt and you should be appreciative that they feel that way about you. You should do what they expect in order to get their tip.

(Local bowling alley in Ames, Iowa - Fall 2016 : all from men older than 30)


He touched her after she said no.
It wasn't just him, it was all of them. They all feel obligated to put their hands on women without giving it any second thought.  They go out with the intentions to touch you and get what they want, no matter what they have to do to get it.

They have reached under her dress/skirt on multiple different occasions. Because somewhere along the lines, a dress began to mean "go". Because you cannot dress up to feel good about yourself without it being sexualized.

They have touched her breasts over 10 times in only one evening, not even considering the countless other evenings she was out. She told them no. Even told one she would have to hit him if he did not stop and he told her she was being dramatic.

But when you yell at them in front of the whole party everyone around says, "Calm down it's not that big of a deal"
-or-
"Quit being a bitch."
-or-
"Quit being dramatic."

But when you confront them days after in broad daylight in front of their friends, they say, "give him a break, he didn't know what he was doing. He was drunk."

But when a woman is drunk, it is her fault if she gets raped?

But you have to stay sober any time you go out
                just to prevent them from thinking you are weak pieces of meat that are easy to bite into..
                Just so you don't have to defend yourselves if the worst actually does happen..
                Just because no one will take your word over a group of theirs..
                Just because they have power over you that you will never be able to win against..

(Iowa State University - Summer 2016 : all actions of student  athletes + a friend of theirs)

he hit her with a pillow

 
He hit her with a pillow, but no one would have understood.


A lot of us are angry, motivated, and strong, we will put an end to it; try and stop us.

xo McKenzie - My Darling Catastrophe
This is the spin off from my recent post to Facebook and Instagram that you can find here:
Facebook : Speak
Instagram : Speak 
 

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